A small magical creature who calls herself “Bubbles” appeared at Amazing Coffee yesterday. Patron Joey Bob Beckwith was taken to Samaritan Regional Medical center due to a nice pair of D’s that Bubbles bestowed on him by magic, and also, apparently, by mistake. He was subsequently released and is scheduled for breast reduction surgery next week.
When the Times contacted Fairy Central, Lulu the dispatcher blamed the incident on poor cell phone reception. “I was trying to dispatch the TIP fairy,” she said, “you know, to charm the TIP JAR. Those performers need better tips.”
Patricia Branco, who was the performer during the incident, is certainly not having any trouble getting tips now.
“Women are fighting each other to get to my tip jar,” she said, “and it ain’t ones, its twenties. I’ll take it, but I wish it was because they love my music.”